The word determination has been on my mind a lot this week. I have been dwelling on it, pondering it, wondering why no one really ever sat down and talked to me about it as a child growing up.
My husband and I started coaching Upward soccer through our church. It's my husbands second year coaching, but my first. I am only assisting him with organizing his team, calling parents and such, doing the paperwork and learning the devotions. Last weeks devotion was on the subject of determination. That is why I have been thinking about it so much. The coaches handbook I have states that "determination is deciding it's worth it to finish what you've started". I had never really thought about it like that. To be honest I had never really thought about it at all.
One of my favorite passages in the Bible is James 1, specifically verses 2-4. "Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish it's work so that you maybe mature and complete, not lacking anything".
Throughout most of the hard times I have had in my life I have clung to, fought with, wrestled with this verse in unimaginable ways. I love it, I appreciate it, understand it, but have had such a hard time accomplishing it and following it's message. My way tends to be I try, try, try, and then give up. I never realized before what a quitter I have been in the past. Sure, I WANT to persevere. I WANT to complete everything I finish. I WANT to be able to make good and wise choices in the face of adversity, but at some point in the fight I tend to lose focus, get frustrated or disappointed and give up because I don't know what to do anymore, or I get too tired of trying.
It's amazing how one little word can change my perspective sometimes in any situation. This one happens to be my life, and once again I point out how sometimes I can hear a message about something for a long time and not "get it", and then hear it again in a completely different way and it makes sense!!! Determination!!!! Deciding BEFOREHAND on a plan or a purpose. Deciding that something is worth finishing. Having a game plan.
If you've been reading my blogs, some of you must be thinking I am very slow to catch on, and yes I admit that I kind of am. I have been trying to persevere in so many different things and areas of my life, without first determining the purpose, plan or what the conclusion may bring. That's hard! Particularly in the midst of a struggle or trial when the end is nowhere in sight, but even in every day life.
Anyway, what this all means to me is it is all about mindset. Since I have dealt with depression for so long, my mindset is something that has never been too good. I have to work at it. I understood the what and the why for so long, but now I understand the how. It's pro-active. It's choosing. For so long I thought that my depression defined who I was, that I didn't have a choice, but I do! I have a choice! In the past year I have been utilizing my ability to make that choice. Not perfectly mind you, but to a much better quality of life than I've had in the past.
Wow, so I wrote this several months ago, BEFORE school was out, and now it's the week before school starts. I'm going to go ahead and publish it like this, and then hopefully and prayerfully I can start some new posts about what has been going on in my life, things I have found and choices I have made and most of it has to do with faith and DETERMINATION.
I am DETERMINED, after a lot of things I have learned over this summer, to get this blog up and running and make it into something.....well, something more than it is now!!! That is going to be my goal!
Tuesday, August 07, 2012
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Changes in View
I have been thinking a lot about this subject lately, and today while I am sitting here looking out my open window and listening to a song that I have on repeat, I've decided to put down some of my thoughts.
We all grew up hearing the phrase "garbage in, garbage out". I know I did, at least at school. It got to the point where I would just roll my eyes and sigh and think to myself what a load of crap it was. We hear about the dangers of exposing kids to violence and sex in the media, video games, etc. We hear about listening to certain kinds of music and how it can affect us. To be honest, I never paid too much attention to it all and I got sick of it. Until I had kids of my own, but even then I never really thought much about it in reference to myself.
I admit, maybe I'm a little slow about catching on to certain things, being 36 and I'm just now beginning to really understand some of this.
Phillipians 4:8 says "Finally brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things"
The Message version puts it this way, and I think it gets to my point a little better. "Summing it all up, friends, I'd say you'll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious-the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not to curse."
Like I said, sometimes I'm a little slow at catching on to things. This verse had been coming up in my life a lot over the past two years and I always saw a little bit of worth in it, but didn't understand and appreciate the deeper value of it until recently.
I have posted a lot about my struggles with depression, anger and hopelessness in the past and how in the last several years things are starting to turn around for me. Looking back, I realize the times when I wasn't struggling with depression so much were the times when I was proactive in my life about what I was reading and listening to. When I mean proactive, I mean instead of just watching shows because they were what was popular, or listening to what was on the radio because it was what was on at the time. I mean, proactively picking shows to watch that uplifted me, music that made me feel, books that made me feel happy.
But I never really put all that together with this verse until recently, probably within the last year, and even more so in the last few months. I have discovered that for me personally, I am what I think. I am what is going on in my brain, and to be honest that is quite a lot. Yes, I have times when I'm really into certain t.v. shows, or playing video games, and while they don't really affect my entire day, when I am proactive about what is going on in the background of my life, whether it be music, listening to sermons online, or Bible studies, my favorite artists, reading books about matters that are important to me, IT DIRECTLY AFFECTS HOW I FEEL AND MOTIVATES MY ACTIONS.
I find that when I am feeling uplifted, encouraged, joyful that living a life in which I am actively walking with Christ becomes so much easier. When I am not consumed by feelings of sadness, frustration, depression and anger the ability to see Jesus is so much clearer. So I've been asking myself if that is why God put this verse in the Bible? Because He knows and understands that what we are or are not thinking about can give us a clear view of Him, or cloud our vision. That if we are proactive about thinking about such positive things it literally pushes out the negative.
The key word there is proactive!!!! For me? When I am depressed or feeling angry, upset...or right now dealing with a lot of physical problems, just being proactive can be a problem in itself. However when I am? My whole day can change! My perspective changes. The impossible becomes possible. The pain lessens, the negative fades, I start to see beauty in the ashes. Just by putting on a favorite praise song. Music seems to be my best helper, and I am learning, struggling, but learning to be proactive about listening to what I know will uplift me.
Christian music is my motivator. Praise and worship. It fills my mind with the Lord. The song I have on repeat right now in my iPod is Natalie Grant's "The Desert Song" from her Love Revolution album. I went through a phase where all I listened to was Mandisa's "Broken Hallelujah".
Yes, I know...I AM slow to catch on to some of these life lessons, and spiritual lessons, because this may be something most everyone else may already know. But I still have to add, by being proactive about what I am putting into my mind, I have to be just as proactive about what I DON'T put in my mind. That is just as important. What may help me focus may be different from anyone else.
Anyway, this has been what has been on my mind today. Today, I feel as if I am finally standing on my own and Jesus is no longer carrying me. I am able to walk with Him of my own accord, and I am so much better for it.
Monday, April 09, 2012
Morning Thoughts
Today is a Monday. Boo. Sometimes Mondays can be really hard. Back to the same old schedule every day. Sometimes I think life is too full of schedules and routines to be fully enjoyed. LOL!!!! Sometimes I think there aren't enough schedules and routines for life to be fully enjoyed. Usually Monday ends up for me being a day to start the week over again, get back into a routine, but more often than not, a day to "recover" from a busy weekend.
Every day of the week, I get up and get my four kids ready for school, with the help of my husband. I take three of them to school, take my husband to work, and then come home for about an hour of peace before it will be time to pick up my youngest son from Pre-K. I have discovered that my drive time alone has become a time when I think a lot about my life, pray, try to understand what is happening and why...it is a time of deep reflection for me.
I started this blog sometime last year due to the encouragement of someone close to me, and like so many things in my life I started all gung-ho and then tapered off until my entries are so few and so far between and why? Life. There have been many times in which I have thought that I had something of worth to say or write down, but...LIFE!
This started me thinking not only about this blog, but so many things in my life, especially my spiritual walk. Those thoughts this morning about my spiritual walk is what made me decide to get on the ball and write something down.
I grew up going to church. In fact, when I was a young child, I couldn't imagine life without going to church every Sunday morning, Sunday night, and Wednesday night. Nothing was ever scheduled on those nights because church was the priority. Then LIFE happened.
I went through a phase where I never attended church. I never wanted to attend church. I refused to be called a christian because I didn't want to be seen as a hypocrite, as I viewed so many of the people that attended church. Then once again, it happened...LIFE.
I got involved in church again and loved it, but not for what I was supposed to love it for, but for the wrong things. And once again LIFE happened, and I found myself, disillusioned, disappointed and angry at God. I spent years drowning in the midst of anger and bitterness, and shaking my fist at Him. I tried to turn my back on Him and live as if He didn't exist. And that's when it hit me, this thought in my head that clarified so much for me personally. "How can I act like God doesn't exist while at the same time being so angry with Him?" Obviously, you can't be angry with someone who doesn't exist! So where do I go from there?
It was this realization that made me understand that my belief in God and his existence was ingrained so deeply within my soul, that I COULD NOT turn my back on Him. Not completely. I couldn't cut Him out of my life and pretend He wasn't there, because He WAS. So I could spend all my time being angry with Him, fighting Him and being miserable, or I could just get back on the track, get "with the program" and start figuring out how to live WITH Him in my life because he obviously wasn't going anywhere. I just hadn't seen Him. I had been looking for Him in all of the wrong places, and in all of the wrong things. I started to realize that when you look for God in people you will always be hurt and disappointed because people are fallible,
I had to break down and come to a place where it was just me and Him. With no one in between. This is where I believe my spiritual walk truly began. My true life journey with Christ. It still took some years before I believe I ever really understood what walking with Him daily truly was, before I could comprehend deeply what it means to live and walk in the spirit and let Him guide me. And believe me, it's been a journey, and one that is far from completion. I stray. I fall. I get distracted. LIFE happens.
We all know what LIFE is...those times when you feel like it's going well and you are getting a handle on everything and then LIFE steps in. You lose a job, a pregnancy, a home. You find out that you have one disease, possibly another and then maybe even another. Your child has a simple surgery and ends up being sick and ends up in the hospital. You're sick, tired, overwhelmed with everything being thrown at you.
This is me, and this describes some of the things I've dealt with over the years, and even the last few months. I find that where I am now in my journey is so much better than where I was years, even months ago. I don't stray as far away from the path. I don't want to get off the path and go my own direction anymore. Yes, LIFE happens, and I allow distractions to get in the way of my view of the path and the God that leads me, but I find that now I am more anxious than ever to get back on the path.
I am nowhere near a perfect Christian, not anywhere close to being the person that I desire to be. But I have started to discover and understand a little better what walking in the spirit and walking with Christ means daily. What I do not understand, is how easy it is for me to get distracted from that.
When I am walking closely with God and working to depend on Him and be in His presence daily (yes, I did say working, it doesn't come naturally) I find that I have more joy, stronger faith, more patience. Little things don't bother me as much. I feel like I have the strength to face any challenge that comes my way. I am happy. Something that has never been easy for me at all!!!
When I get distracted, my problems drown out everything. I stop working to be close to Him. I become irritable, frustrate easily, unmotivated. Even though I long to get back to where I was, I doubt my faith. I get tired and don't want to move. So where is God when this happens? And why does it happen?
I picture it like this in my mind.
Life is like a long winding road that goes on so far that I can't see the end. It goes through deserts, it goes through forests, it goes through plains and meadows and up hills and down in valleys, through rocky terrain and clear easy paths. Jesus is walking with me every step of the way but sometimes I get ahead of Him. Other times something else entices me to go a different direction. Sometimes, something is in my way, it trips me up and I fall flat on my face. Sometimes I get lost in the trees and lose sight of Him. Sometimes I just need a rest. Like a child going on a walk with their parent. There is that moment when I want to go no further, not backward, not forward, and like a parent, sometimes Jesus has to wait for me to get through my fatigue, anger, fears etc. He never leaves my side, but like I have to do with my kids sometimes, I just have to let them get through it and then I can deal with them. So He stays with me and waits, and unlike me and my own children, He doesn't lose patience, and He doesn't get angry. Sometimes there are the times when I can't get through it and He just picks me up and carries me like I would with my children. When I can see straight, through all my fears and feelings once again, He's the first thing I see and I can stand up and start the journey all over again.
Do I like this process? Several years ago? I probably would have said something like "I don't really care". A year ago? Two years ago? I could have honestly said that it frustrated me. Now? I don't like it at all!!!!
If I could have my way, I would keep with Jesus every step of the way!!! I would never get tired. I would never get frustrated. I would never get distracted and lose sight of him, but that's LIFE!!! That's why it's called a journey!!! Because despite all of the things that happen that cause me to lose sight of Him, it draws me closer to Him. Each time I stray a little less. Each time I fall a little shorter. Each time I'm lost for less time. I find myself looking up faster, calling to Him quicker, and leaning on Him more. I find that I'm not as bold to explore on my own down the path because I want to be with Him. I want to learn what He has to say, and to see what He has to show me. I want to be with Him, because He makes the whole journey easier and worthwhile. He can show me things I would have missed without Him by my side. He can help me understand more things. He can keep me safe from the darkness. He can shield me from harm.
I AM still going to get tired, I AM still going to fall, and I AM still going to get distracted because I am human and because that is life and those things happen in life. But each time, it reminds me that I can stay closer to Him longer and that He will never leave my side and that in itself strengthens my faith. My acceptance of these very facts is proof to me that the journey is already worth it!
So these are the thoughts that were on my mind this morning. I have to admit, I've been in an area of my journey where maybe He has been carrying me for awhile. I have been distracted and LIFE has happened. But I'm ready to get up and get moving and get back on the path. I hope that I can stay on it a little longer this time, be a little stronger and not fall flat on my face for awhile.
Every day of the week, I get up and get my four kids ready for school, with the help of my husband. I take three of them to school, take my husband to work, and then come home for about an hour of peace before it will be time to pick up my youngest son from Pre-K. I have discovered that my drive time alone has become a time when I think a lot about my life, pray, try to understand what is happening and why...it is a time of deep reflection for me.
I started this blog sometime last year due to the encouragement of someone close to me, and like so many things in my life I started all gung-ho and then tapered off until my entries are so few and so far between and why? Life. There have been many times in which I have thought that I had something of worth to say or write down, but...LIFE!
This started me thinking not only about this blog, but so many things in my life, especially my spiritual walk. Those thoughts this morning about my spiritual walk is what made me decide to get on the ball and write something down.
I grew up going to church. In fact, when I was a young child, I couldn't imagine life without going to church every Sunday morning, Sunday night, and Wednesday night. Nothing was ever scheduled on those nights because church was the priority. Then LIFE happened.
I went through a phase where I never attended church. I never wanted to attend church. I refused to be called a christian because I didn't want to be seen as a hypocrite, as I viewed so many of the people that attended church. Then once again, it happened...LIFE.
I got involved in church again and loved it, but not for what I was supposed to love it for, but for the wrong things. And once again LIFE happened, and I found myself, disillusioned, disappointed and angry at God. I spent years drowning in the midst of anger and bitterness, and shaking my fist at Him. I tried to turn my back on Him and live as if He didn't exist. And that's when it hit me, this thought in my head that clarified so much for me personally. "How can I act like God doesn't exist while at the same time being so angry with Him?" Obviously, you can't be angry with someone who doesn't exist! So where do I go from there?
It was this realization that made me understand that my belief in God and his existence was ingrained so deeply within my soul, that I COULD NOT turn my back on Him. Not completely. I couldn't cut Him out of my life and pretend He wasn't there, because He WAS. So I could spend all my time being angry with Him, fighting Him and being miserable, or I could just get back on the track, get "with the program" and start figuring out how to live WITH Him in my life because he obviously wasn't going anywhere. I just hadn't seen Him. I had been looking for Him in all of the wrong places, and in all of the wrong things. I started to realize that when you look for God in people you will always be hurt and disappointed because people are fallible,
I had to break down and come to a place where it was just me and Him. With no one in between. This is where I believe my spiritual walk truly began. My true life journey with Christ. It still took some years before I believe I ever really understood what walking with Him daily truly was, before I could comprehend deeply what it means to live and walk in the spirit and let Him guide me. And believe me, it's been a journey, and one that is far from completion. I stray. I fall. I get distracted. LIFE happens.
We all know what LIFE is...those times when you feel like it's going well and you are getting a handle on everything and then LIFE steps in. You lose a job, a pregnancy, a home. You find out that you have one disease, possibly another and then maybe even another. Your child has a simple surgery and ends up being sick and ends up in the hospital. You're sick, tired, overwhelmed with everything being thrown at you.
This is me, and this describes some of the things I've dealt with over the years, and even the last few months. I find that where I am now in my journey is so much better than where I was years, even months ago. I don't stray as far away from the path. I don't want to get off the path and go my own direction anymore. Yes, LIFE happens, and I allow distractions to get in the way of my view of the path and the God that leads me, but I find that now I am more anxious than ever to get back on the path.
I am nowhere near a perfect Christian, not anywhere close to being the person that I desire to be. But I have started to discover and understand a little better what walking in the spirit and walking with Christ means daily. What I do not understand, is how easy it is for me to get distracted from that.
When I am walking closely with God and working to depend on Him and be in His presence daily (yes, I did say working, it doesn't come naturally) I find that I have more joy, stronger faith, more patience. Little things don't bother me as much. I feel like I have the strength to face any challenge that comes my way. I am happy. Something that has never been easy for me at all!!!
When I get distracted, my problems drown out everything. I stop working to be close to Him. I become irritable, frustrate easily, unmotivated. Even though I long to get back to where I was, I doubt my faith. I get tired and don't want to move. So where is God when this happens? And why does it happen?
I picture it like this in my mind.
Life is like a long winding road that goes on so far that I can't see the end. It goes through deserts, it goes through forests, it goes through plains and meadows and up hills and down in valleys, through rocky terrain and clear easy paths. Jesus is walking with me every step of the way but sometimes I get ahead of Him. Other times something else entices me to go a different direction. Sometimes, something is in my way, it trips me up and I fall flat on my face. Sometimes I get lost in the trees and lose sight of Him. Sometimes I just need a rest. Like a child going on a walk with their parent. There is that moment when I want to go no further, not backward, not forward, and like a parent, sometimes Jesus has to wait for me to get through my fatigue, anger, fears etc. He never leaves my side, but like I have to do with my kids sometimes, I just have to let them get through it and then I can deal with them. So He stays with me and waits, and unlike me and my own children, He doesn't lose patience, and He doesn't get angry. Sometimes there are the times when I can't get through it and He just picks me up and carries me like I would with my children. When I can see straight, through all my fears and feelings once again, He's the first thing I see and I can stand up and start the journey all over again.
Do I like this process? Several years ago? I probably would have said something like "I don't really care". A year ago? Two years ago? I could have honestly said that it frustrated me. Now? I don't like it at all!!!!
If I could have my way, I would keep with Jesus every step of the way!!! I would never get tired. I would never get frustrated. I would never get distracted and lose sight of him, but that's LIFE!!! That's why it's called a journey!!! Because despite all of the things that happen that cause me to lose sight of Him, it draws me closer to Him. Each time I stray a little less. Each time I fall a little shorter. Each time I'm lost for less time. I find myself looking up faster, calling to Him quicker, and leaning on Him more. I find that I'm not as bold to explore on my own down the path because I want to be with Him. I want to learn what He has to say, and to see what He has to show me. I want to be with Him, because He makes the whole journey easier and worthwhile. He can show me things I would have missed without Him by my side. He can help me understand more things. He can keep me safe from the darkness. He can shield me from harm.
I AM still going to get tired, I AM still going to fall, and I AM still going to get distracted because I am human and because that is life and those things happen in life. But each time, it reminds me that I can stay closer to Him longer and that He will never leave my side and that in itself strengthens my faith. My acceptance of these very facts is proof to me that the journey is already worth it!
So these are the thoughts that were on my mind this morning. I have to admit, I've been in an area of my journey where maybe He has been carrying me for awhile. I have been distracted and LIFE has happened. But I'm ready to get up and get moving and get back on the path. I hope that I can stay on it a little longer this time, be a little stronger and not fall flat on my face for awhile.
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
"So Much"
I haven't posted for awhile. LIFE...as they call it has gotten to me. Through it all, I find myself learning everyday. I find myself wanting to learn more than I think I possibly can.
One of the things that I am learning...and I say "learning" like that, because it's something that I've been told, known, read about etc, and just could never get myself to fully believe. I struggle with depression off and on. I'm what you would call a pessimist, although I never saw myself as one. Optimism just hasn't been one of my strengths. I've had a lot of people in recent years tell me how negative I am, and I always had an excuse of "well, if things are negative then I guess I'm negative". I wasn't strong in the Pollyanna view of life to LOOK for the good. So this is what I am learning.
1. There is ALWAYS a positive. Even when you don't see it, it's there and you have to CHOOSE to see it and BELIEVE it.
2. Circumstances may be hard, but you can CHOOSE to surround yourself with the positive.
I see such a difference in my life, my mind and my attitude when I take Philippians 4:8 to heart and dwell on it. "Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable---if anything is excellent or praiseworthy---think about such things."
I'm not a Bible scholar, and I've read over this verse a lot, especially over the course of the past year, and I liked it, I thought I understood it, but it wasn't deeply seeded in me....but now I think I get it. We are, and we act what's in our minds and hearts. I am, and I act what's in my mind and my heart. When I think about good, pure, lovely admirable things, life goes so much easier. When I think about negative, untruths, compare myself to others, life is such a struggle for me.
You can go through life hearing a lesson, reading a verse and not have it get to you in a deep way that it truly takes on meaning. And if you're like me, sometimes a little too thick for your own good, well, it could take some time. It's taken me 36 years to understand this, and now I am making an effort to put it to use every day of my life.
Meditating on God's word. Meditating on God's affirmations for me and who I am in Him. Learning to look for things to be grateful for even when I'm not feeling grateful, or just plain negative.
Working to surround myself with positive, uplifting, true, lovely, things. Listening to beautiful, positive music. Ensconcing myself in scripture, Bible lessons, audio Bible, online Bible lessons with Beth Moore, Chip Ingram, Joyce Meyers. Literally drowning myself in all the good to push out the negative. It makes a change in me, and a change my my life and my responses to those around me.
I recently stumbled across some websites about this very subject, and have really taken to heart the statements they talk about. Again, I stress, sometimes you can grow up and live your life hearing something over and over again, but sometimes it takes an "ah-ha" moment for it to make sense.
Change what you say when you talk to your mind. This is HUGE to me...so often I get lost in the lies about myself or in comparing myself to others and it truly affects me. I have to not only STOP saying and thinking the negative, but I have to ALSO START thinking and saying the positive. Both work together. And I love the quote..."A persistently positive focus creates a consistently positive mind".
I think that's what God means in Philippians 4:8. If you are constantly dwelling on the positive, beautiful things you have no room for the negative. Is it easy? No. Life is hard. We are surrounded by negativity and evil everywhere we turn, to the point that it can be all-consuming. But in my mind, that's why life is a journey--to learn these lessons and to put them to use. Some of us may take longer to learn the lessons, some of us may have to work harder to put them to use.
I know for me, I've seen the results, I like the results, but a lot of times it's the motivation to do the work, and what happens after that? I fall apart and all the negative rushes back. I can only pray that this will not always be so hard for me, that one day a cycle of getting up and falling down, getting up and falling down, will merely be a bit of a struggle instead of a constant war.
One of the things that I am learning...and I say "learning" like that, because it's something that I've been told, known, read about etc, and just could never get myself to fully believe. I struggle with depression off and on. I'm what you would call a pessimist, although I never saw myself as one. Optimism just hasn't been one of my strengths. I've had a lot of people in recent years tell me how negative I am, and I always had an excuse of "well, if things are negative then I guess I'm negative". I wasn't strong in the Pollyanna view of life to LOOK for the good. So this is what I am learning.
1. There is ALWAYS a positive. Even when you don't see it, it's there and you have to CHOOSE to see it and BELIEVE it.
2. Circumstances may be hard, but you can CHOOSE to surround yourself with the positive.
I see such a difference in my life, my mind and my attitude when I take Philippians 4:8 to heart and dwell on it. "Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable---if anything is excellent or praiseworthy---think about such things."
I'm not a Bible scholar, and I've read over this verse a lot, especially over the course of the past year, and I liked it, I thought I understood it, but it wasn't deeply seeded in me....but now I think I get it. We are, and we act what's in our minds and hearts. I am, and I act what's in my mind and my heart. When I think about good, pure, lovely admirable things, life goes so much easier. When I think about negative, untruths, compare myself to others, life is such a struggle for me.
You can go through life hearing a lesson, reading a verse and not have it get to you in a deep way that it truly takes on meaning. And if you're like me, sometimes a little too thick for your own good, well, it could take some time. It's taken me 36 years to understand this, and now I am making an effort to put it to use every day of my life.
Meditating on God's word. Meditating on God's affirmations for me and who I am in Him. Learning to look for things to be grateful for even when I'm not feeling grateful, or just plain negative.
Working to surround myself with positive, uplifting, true, lovely, things. Listening to beautiful, positive music. Ensconcing myself in scripture, Bible lessons, audio Bible, online Bible lessons with Beth Moore, Chip Ingram, Joyce Meyers. Literally drowning myself in all the good to push out the negative. It makes a change in me, and a change my my life and my responses to those around me.
I recently stumbled across some websites about this very subject, and have really taken to heart the statements they talk about. Again, I stress, sometimes you can grow up and live your life hearing something over and over again, but sometimes it takes an "ah-ha" moment for it to make sense.
Change what you say when you talk to your mind. This is HUGE to me...so often I get lost in the lies about myself or in comparing myself to others and it truly affects me. I have to not only STOP saying and thinking the negative, but I have to ALSO START thinking and saying the positive. Both work together. And I love the quote..."A persistently positive focus creates a consistently positive mind".
I think that's what God means in Philippians 4:8. If you are constantly dwelling on the positive, beautiful things you have no room for the negative. Is it easy? No. Life is hard. We are surrounded by negativity and evil everywhere we turn, to the point that it can be all-consuming. But in my mind, that's why life is a journey--to learn these lessons and to put them to use. Some of us may take longer to learn the lessons, some of us may have to work harder to put them to use.
I know for me, I've seen the results, I like the results, but a lot of times it's the motivation to do the work, and what happens after that? I fall apart and all the negative rushes back. I can only pray that this will not always be so hard for me, that one day a cycle of getting up and falling down, getting up and falling down, will merely be a bit of a struggle instead of a constant war.
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